Oh you guys. I have been teasing you. Asking you to cross fingers and toes and some close people had to listen to the odyssey that went down before we finally got the word: We are moving!
Yes, the 6 of us will re-locate and you readers with the eagle eyes probably already managed to ‘unlock’ our next destination from the photo.
London. Not a complete new spot on the landmark but a very welcome one.
We were hoping to move for a fair amount of time and were thinking about a possible destination overseas. And if that would not work out we both (hubby and I) agreed that London would be T H E place in Europe we can imagine. So the overseas thing was ruled out quickly and we did get London. And for some extra fun: We will move in a couple of weeks time. We will be in town for a week in September where we hope to find a house and then we will move at the end of October. Not much time left indeed and our to-do-lists are long!
But I also wanted to use this moment to share a little more about the last months. Because one reason why I asked if you would like to see more personal posts was because I know that I have been neglecting this part here a lot. I am not even sure how to start this because in short: 2018 is just not my year. It is slowly getting better…
The year started with all of us being on a trip to Germany, foremost visiting my mum. Who was ill for a while already and I have been over on some last minute trips the months before. One thing that cheered her up was knowing that she would see all of for a few days in the very beginning of the New Year. My brother joined as well and with him my very first niece, born last year August. A little family reunion if you like.
Unfortunately things did not go better with my mum and we lost her in February. Tomorrow it will be 7 months. Between our visit and me thinking that I would go and see her during the February break with the children, visit to trade shows and other stuff, lots of skype calls and hope… it happened. The shock. The everything. The feeling of sitting in your own movie and everything that comes with these moments. You know that it is impossible to describe. I have not shared it really on any social outlet… because what do you want to say? What can anyone say?
I was living in a cloud for like two or three weeks. Could not see or talk to anyone without crying. The moment you would ask me the very ‘innocent’ – how are you – I was done. Everything seemed so empty and ‘useless’.
Having your own family helps a lot. Having children helps a lot. It was a shock for them too and we are actually still working on it. I am so happy that we were always honest about my mums illness and how she was them. So they did not get the news like they fell from the sky. And their view of things, the questions, talks and tears – they were not easy. But they were good and also helped me to deal with it!
And yes, this put a lot in perspective. I did work so much the weeks after just to stay busy and to have as little time as possible to think. I was also traveling a fair but for work and some projects that I did not cancel. Now, this may not be your way of dealing with death and it may not be the smartest thing to do. I am not even sure I would recommend it because I admit, there was a moment – somewhere in May – where I was just done. Totally worn out.
Tired, sad, in between suitcases and still some funeral/ paper work aftermath, family and also this whole ‘re-location’ topic on top of our heads.
Are we moving? When? Where? Conditions? Can we go on holidays over the summer? We really would need one!
Well… about the end of June things slowed down a little. Less travel and summer which means that people are away and your inbox does not go ‘ding ding’ every five seconds. We just still did not know about the move. We knew that it would be London and that we were looking into September to have the kids go back to school with everyone else. Until things were slow here too … again!
A friend of mine, who knew everything about my situation mentioned that this all sound like a good crime novel. Well yes!
We only told the children like not even two weeks ago. When we still had no official paper work but already the trip in September booked. Looking for houses and everything and I started to feel really shixxy that they were not in the loop.
Well…. what can I say. Our eldest turned 11 this summer. Antoine is 8 and the two youngest will turn 3 and 6 now in September (Party month!).
When we announced the news, one weekday after diner, the two eldest immediately started crying. We did expect it and we did touch the topic of moving a little bit here and there and especially Romy was not impressed by the idea at all. But they did calm down very quickly (much quicker than I thought) and we did explain all our as well as work related reasons. And then we came with all the stuff we can and will do in London. For that we are lucky because there is basically nothing that you cannot do, find or see in this city. (they are both huge Harry Potter fans too – extra bonus for us again)
And Romy was born in London… which feels, to me, a little like we are closing the circle. Going back to the very beginning of our parenthood journey. Where it all began!
Of course the idea of leaving their friends behind is still frightening, being the new one too but they are interested and talk a lot about London, we search for houses together and plan a few cool things when we go in September. Josephine’s birthday falls into this week so we have all the good reasons…
Next step, new beginning (in a way) and hopefully 2018 will end in a better way than it started!
xoxo
PS: I will try to update you a little about this move but to be honest, time is short and I am not sure how much I will manage.
PSS: I think the photos are a good portrait of how everyone feels over here… mixed emotions!
